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Wednesday, 19 September 2012


I seriously, seriously don't understand why I even have this. It seemed like a good idea at the time to make one, but fuck, I'm so bad at keeping up with current events on my life. I don't even know where to begin.

I'm engaged, lets start with that. Yep. Most wonderful, amazing, fantastic boy you could find. We're seriously like the same person split in half, it's a little weird. But hey, he makes me happy and I can be a complete child around him and not be embarrassed and he deals with my family on a daily basis so fuck it, he's not going anywhere.

I got a new job, too. Yay! No more McDonalds! Pretty great. I was really starting to hate everything and pretty much everyone there... but I don't have to deal with them anymore. Babe still works there, but I can live with that. He's there now, actually.
I work at a little sandwich shop down on Carling and Woodroffe called Alba Fresco's. Adorable little thing; only five of us work there. The two owners, their youngest sister and my friend. It's pretty great since work drama is just... well not there and it's one of the best feelings in the world. It's just so much fun. Maybe that's what I'll blog about - what I learn at work.
Friday I learned how to make pizza dough. We use honey instead of sugar. I don't know if that's like.. a business secret and I just fucked something up like the Krusty Krab but whatever! Regardless it's fucking wonderful and I'm so excited to start working there pretty much full-time.

My (ex)best friend and I are obviously no longer friends. She's just turned into a massive bitch since she started dating her boyfriend. + she missed my birthday after telling me, my fiance, and my friend that she'd be there... and didn't say happy birthday to me till AFTER she told me she wasn't gonna come. Then, she takes pretty much 3 weeks to bring my books back. I know it sounds childish and I shouldn't end a friendship over this but seriously, she cannot go anywhere with her boyfriend. I asked her if she wanted to get breakfast, just the two of us. Nope. Her boyfriend and his friend were there. Uhm, no. You didn't tell me they'd be there, thanks.
Little things like that. Like how whenever we'd hang out one on one, she'd always have to rush off and pick him up, or he'd be on his way, or something ridiculous like that. I do spend time with my fiance a lot, we live together and my friends adore him... but I also ask my friends if it's OKAY if he comes along when we hang out because I know how annoying it is. Grawr, I just hate people.

I'm back in school. Three credits left, pretty stoked. Just want to finish. I'm three quarters of the way done my first credit, actually. Math. I fucking hate it, but it's making sense so woo! It makes me happy, math and I have never been friends.
OKAY there's some girl screaming war cries outside my window.
I'm going to go take a shower now before I cry.


Friday, 3 August 2012


Wow, so I'm really bad at this whole blog thing, eh? Whoops, sorry.

I just got back from a four day vacation out in the country with the boyfriend, and let me tell you - you learn some things when you're stuck without cell phone service or internet.

1. I am not a dog person.
- His grandma and her husband own three dogs. Two of them are puppies and oh my god are they ever big and hyper and just a total hand-full and how this couple deals with them is beyond me. I was warned that the dogs are a little out of control, but nothing could have prepared me for that. I was covered in dirt a good portion of the time and slob, too, because they're just so big and messy and don't give a fuck.

2. Even though homemade Chinese food tastes better, it still makes me sick.
- Pretty self explanitory. I don't eat Chinese. I don't like it, it doesn't sit well with my stomach and it just isn't okay. But I decided to put my taste buds aside and have some regardless because I didn't want to be rude. It was good, but just like every other time, it made me sick. No Chinese for Tara.

3. I want a pet frog.
- They have a pond in their backyard, and over the course of the four days we saw about a dozen frogs just jamming, doing whatever. I asked my boyfriend to catch me one, so he caught me two. I obviously didn't bring them home because I can't take care of them and they'd die, but they were the cutest things in the world.

4. Mother cats are protective as fuck.
- Because it's out in the middle of nowhere French town, there's a lot of stray cats running around. One of them has decided to be kind of adopted into their family. Ami feeds her and gives her milk and all that stuff. Well, she gave birth a couple weeks ago (although we haven't seen the kittens yet) and she's very protective. Another kitten from a different litter, tried to steal some food and milk while the cat was there. She hissed at him, chased him away, even took a swat at him. Then she proceeded to spend the next 20 minutes leaving her scent everywhere, to let the other cats know not to fuck around. It was a little cute, to be honest.

5. I will live in the country when I'm older.
- It's just so peaceful, everything about it. So quiet, the air is clean and I sleep a lot better. I can't wait, it was perfection out there. I loved it, never wanted to come home.

6. I suck at badminton.
- It's been years since I've played, but we decided it'd be a good idea and a good work-out. Oh my god, talk about embarrassment. It was fun though, we laughed a lot at how badly we both were doing.

Some other stuff happened as well, like not having a phone which was beyond relaxing, but that's pretty much the jist of it. I had fun, and I hope I'll be able to go back sometime.
Also, I'll be 19 in seven days. Holy fuck.

Sunday, 1 July 2012

Canada Day

Whoa, as if it's already July.
Today's Canada Day. Instead of going out and getting ridiculously drunk like a good teenager probably should have, I stayed home and spent my day in bed, watching chick flicks and cuddling. Then like a good woman that I am, I cleaned and baked. It was a good day.

I just don't get the whole "Oh my god, it's Canada Day!" part of Canada Day. I just look at it like it's another day. And watching people getting shit faced isn't as fun as it used to be. Actually, it makes me kind of sick.
My brother went out, and on his way home he was cornered between all these drunks yelling back and forth, while someone lite up a bong a couple seats away from him. That isn't normal. You don't light bongs on buses. Every year I get more and more scared that all these 'holidays' are just being ruined because all anyone ever wants to do is go out and get hammered.
I understand the point in drinking, but what's the point if you're going to black out and forget everything from the night before? You act like an idiot, you get in trouble, and it doesn't seem worth it to me. Sure, I'm a straight edge, but that's only cause I've had my share of nights out and about and waking up the next morning being like, "What the fuck did I just do/Did that really happen" and it isn't all that exciting.
I get it's a 'birthday' and people celebrate by going out and drinking, but holy fuck. Calm down a little bit, there isn't a need to go overboard. Maybe I'm just bitter, though. Everyone tells me I'd be happier if I went out more and hung out with my friends and stuff but I'm so tired of everything always revolving around getting drunk or high or fucking random bitches cause they can.
No. Just stop. Regardless of how young you are, you're being an idiot. YOLO is not an excuse to act like a total retard and catch some sort of STD because you can. I feel like an old woman when I go on rants like these, but I really wish people would realize that someday they'll have to put the bottle down and start focusing on their life and what they want to do with it. I don't care if they're in Uni already, half of these kids should still be back in high school with the way they act.
It actually disgusts me when I hear about people getting smashed off their asses and getting into shit. It isn't 'cool' or 'hype'. You're gonna get hurt one day, or something's gonna happen and you're gonna fuck yourself over hard core and then what? You have nothing.
I'm obviously not saying don't drink ever, cause drinking in moderation can be fun sometimes, just holy fuck. Watch yourself. Learn your limits, plan ahead. Don't be a fucking idiot.

I hope everyone's had a safe and wonderful Canada Day.

Friday, 29 June 2012


Whoa, okay.
So I sorta maybe kind of forgot this was around. Mostly because everything got out of control and I suck at keeping up with this kind of stuff and you know, Christmas and New Year and then everything else was just kind of fucked up and YAY.

But anyway, I'm back and hopefully I can keep it up this time :P It's been like six months, awks.
Everything that I had planned for 2012 has happened.
Anime North was probably the best weekend of my life. I'm gonna talk about it.

Okay first of all, SO many fucking people. On the bus to the convention Saturday, honestly, the whole bus was going to the convention. Every single bus headed that way was filled with people dressed in the weirdest cosplay outfits I had ever seen. I waited for two hours, almost three in line on Friday just to register. It was retarded the amount of people that showed up.
The dealers room was completely overwhelming, I didn't even know what to do with myself. I pretty much just walked around like an idiot for a good portion of it gawking at everything they had going on. I didn't dress up, due to the fact that I was 1) lazy 2) it was hot as fuck 3) it was my first time going and I wanted to see what it was like.
NEXT YEAR HOWEVER, omfg. I am going to have the best outfit :3 hehehe.
It was amazing, I felt so happy and carefree and I got a ton of new Mangas and small things and keychains to add on to my collection of them that hang off my two keys :$ But it was worth it.

Other news, I got docked for having blue hair at work. My district manager hates me with a passion and decided to be a total asshole which then caused me to have a complete meltdown in front of two of my managers and it wasn't pretty. I cut my hours down, though and I've decided I'm gonna start taking care of myself again and doing things I enjoy because I really need to focus on myself.
Getting on medication will help, once I get a hold of my doctor, because right now my anxiety is beyond belief. I pretty much just want to sleep all the time and never leave my bed because the outside world terrifies me. But I'm working on it.
Hmm, not much else is happening. Been too busy stressing out and being sick to really care about anything else. I still hate everyone, but that will never change.


Sunday, 11 December 2011


I usually hate Christmas. And by usually, I mean, every year I'm either sick, annoyed with my parents because they woke me up too early (seriously) OR, I get annoyed during dinner being yelled at my relatives that only have a look into my life by Facebook from cousins who live in the states. Christmas is my most hated holiday of the year, and December is the worst month (second only to February).
However, it's been a crazy year for everyone in my family. My brother was diagnosed with epilepsy at the start of 2011, after suffering two seizures. Almost a year later, they still haven't solved the problem and he's taking seven pills, twice a day, every day. Not only that, but he started high school - which what should be a great experience, hasn't turned out to be the best.
Both my parents have had struggles with their jobs. My mom took on an Acting AS5 position, which she should have finished in September. Months later, she's still working the same job, except the pay is back to what she was making as an AS4 and she's doing three different jobs. Also, the amount of effort it's taken her to deal with my brother AND be a mom, has worn her down.
My father quit his job, as I mentioned, due to a bunch of things happening over the past year and a half. His (ex)boss Sean, is probably the stupidest man I have ever met - and I haven't been formally introduced, either. For months, he would threaten my father, telling him if he didn't meet certain goals, he'd fire him. My father struggled to keep the store open for as long as he did; trying to make ends meet. It isn't a high business store, yet Sean expected him to rack in the money. This isn't Montreal, this isn't Toronto. This is Ottawa, and it was bullshit. Also, the stress of my brother, myself, and my mom all on him, I'm surprised he's still around. I'm glad he is.
My Aunt was diagnosed with Colon Cancer a couple months ago. I was told last week, she will not make it. She's dying. As you know, one of  my close friends dad passed away two months ago. My Aunt is moving in the new year, which is another reason why this Christmas/New Years is extremely important.
Of course, a lot of stuff has happened with me, and I'm looking forward to just put it all behind and restart from the ground up. I'm going back into Karate in the new year, and I'm going to buckle down and get school done. I'm also changing my diet and hopefully, the things that are going well, will keep going that way.

I work on Christmas, 9-5.
We're doing stockings in the morning before I leave, and presents after dinner. It's new for our family, usually we do it all at once, but I think doing it at night would be easier. I'll be awake and able to enjoy the company. Of course Christmas Eve isn't changing, we'll still do our PJ presents and hot chocolate.
I'm looking forward to snow, and Christmas, and New Years and I just want it all to fall together. I have presents all wrapped and ready to go and I'm just so excited. More so to see everyone else so happy. I don't care much for the presents (although, it is a nice bonus ;))
Hopefully we'll have a white Christmas and I'll be able to have my Winter Wonderland photoshoot I've been craving for all week. I know, me, wanting snow - funny.

Right now, I could care less about anything. As long as my parents and brother are happy, so am I.
It's going to be a good Christmas.

Saturday, 10 December 2011


You know you haven't been on in awhile when you're signed out and don't remember your password. Awkward penguin.

I went to Montreal yesterday, spent the night. Came home around 3pm today. It was a short visit, extremely (which is why I just booked a week off in January to go back), but it was a much needed one. My friends 18th birthday was on Thursday, however, despite previous plans, we just stayed at my hotel for most of the night.
It was absolutely wonderful. I didn't realize how much I missed it, until I was days away from going and I couldn't wait any longer. Being  there made me feel so much better about everything.
I found my mothers Christmas present - one more thing to find and then I'm done!

We went shopping (obviously) and I found yellow low top Converse that I've been wanting for years. $55, couldn't say no. Then we went and saw Happy Feet 2, which is a GREAT movie, so cute. Again, I cried through the whole thing, but it's a cute movie so it's okay.
It was really gross out, just wet and rainy and stuff, so thankfully my hotel had a cute little restaurant built into the side of it. Once back at the hotel, we got changed and ready and went down for drinks and dinner. I don't understand what it is about French people, but I they have HUGE portions of food. Ridiculousness. I had ordered a Poutine, and it was just this massive plate of fries, cheese and gravy. It was delicious, and I really wish I could have finished it, but my stomach is not that big. The old man who was working there made fun of me for it, no big deal.
After dinner, we just went back up and watched TV, ate some more and talked. I hadn't seen my friend in fourish months, so it was really nice to just sit and catch up. Although I'm a little disappointed that I didn't get to stay as long as I had hoped, when I have more money and time, I'll be back. I just needed to go now so I wouldn't explode.

I'm exhausted, beyond comparison and I wish I could just stay in bed. But I have Starbucks plans with an old friend, which I cannot cancel on. Christmas present time! Woot.
I'll let you know if anything new happens :3

Montreal - Night Belvedere - Montreal, Quebec

Tuesday, 29 November 2011

Rainy days.


Montreal <3

HI. I haven't written in awhile, mostly because a bunch of stuff has happened in the past week, but everything's getting better now.
My dad quit his job last week. His boss is an asshole and was treating my dad like shit. I was pretty scared, but my dad seems to have his head in the right place, so all I can really do is sit back and believe he knows what he's doing. He's strong.
Grey Cup was last weekend. No idea who won, I don't really care. But people were over, and it was nice. Got a little high, ate way too much. Always fun.
Now, I'm really excited because, I'm going to Montreal in TEN DAYS. I booked my train ticket today, made sure I still have reservations at the hotel I booked. Now I just need to pack and I'm good to go! I can't wait. It's going to be so much fun.
My friends 18th birthday is the day before I get there, so you know we'll spend the weekend in a club, drunk as fuck. It's going to be great. Do a little shopping, no big deal. My hotel's a street away from St Catherines so you know I'll be spending some money. Going to get my nose pierced, both sides, awyee.

I'm thinking of getting my nape pierced this weekend, although I'm not too sure on it. I want it, I just don't know if I should be spending the money right now.
Payday's on Thursday, so we'll see :D

Anyways, 10 days.
I have to go get ready for work, but I'll be sure to keep you posted!